Yesterday, I read and re-read this post from my friend, Sweat Pink sis, and badass businesswoman, Ariana about how she’s committing to doing less in 2018…
Her words kept replaying in my head throughout the day. I seriously couldn’t shake them. I couldn’t stop reading them. Less worrying. Less perfecting. Less doing….And I realized that I spend a lot of time in the mode of “doing,” of “perfecting,” of “striving to be more.”
And I think this striving to be more, this feeling of needing to chase big goals, or run faster, farther, or even just be ahead of my inbox or on top of the things I need to do at home, had me driving myself crazy.
When I first heard that I had placenta previa and was going to have lay off the running, heavy lifting and strenuous activity, I died a slow death inside. I felt so totally restricted, angry, sad, and sorry for myself (cue the unicorn tears). I focused so much on the “can’t do,” that I couldn’t see the can do. I was so focused on the doing “more” that I couldn’t see that doing less might actually be good for me.
In fact, I’m not really that restricted – just by my own ego, perhaps – my feelings of rage and sadness were mainly because I was told I shouldn’t do more. Nobody told me I couldn’t do anything. The limitations I was feeling were because of false expectations I put on myself – to do more. To run more miles. To get faster. To go harder. To be stronger. To show pregnancy who was really boss.
And all of that was just plain silly and limiting. I couldn’t see that by putting those expectations on myself, I was limiting myself from what I could be doing, the things that would make me feel happy and alive.
And then one long walk changed everything for me. Shifted my perspective entirely…
On New Year’s Day, the Sweat Pink team decided we’d all sweat together for a run / walk event with Gixo. At first, I thought, dammit, I can’t run. This sucks. I’m going to have to walk the whole time. Wah. Wahhhh. But I pushed the negative thoughts aside, put my big girl pants on, and joined the Gixo Resolution Run and I walked. I didn’t run. I didn’t crush any big goals. Or do anything amazing. But I walked, worked up a sweat, got my blood pumping, and the fresh air (albeit cold) felt so amazing on my skin. And I wanted more.
The next day, I went out and walked again. And the next day, again. And the next…I’ve walked at least 3 miles every day since and don’t plan on stopping anytime soon.
This week, I joined the Gixo Endurance Run / Walk on Monday and had a big 6.5 mile day, with some impressive power walking, jogging paces, to boot. And today, I got another impressive 6 miles in (yes, I’m actively patting myself on the back), 4 miles of which I enjoyed out on the trails with Abbie, while getting motivated by one of the Gixo coaches (Coach Medwin) during the Cardio Quickie workout.
Now that I’m focusing on the “can,” I’m feeling so much stronger, lighter, and downright happier. I’ve stopped hesitating to join workouts for fear that I can’t do something, or for fear that I won’t be able to accomplish anything big, and just started living again. Less worrying, less striving, less perfecting, less second guessing…. More of just getting out and moving. More of doing things that make me feel happy and alive.
Because I can. And I will. Because I AM LIMITLESS.
Want to join me for a run or a walk this week or next? I’ve already got a bunch of fun Gixo workouts scheduled – walk/ runs, and cardio challenges – and I’m listing all of my class times here and hoping y’all will join me for the fun!
Stay sweaty friends,
Disclaimer: This post was sponsored by Gixo. That being said, all of my ramblings, thoughts expressed, self doubt, workout highs, and words are my very own. I truly appreciate all of the brands that support the Sweat Pink community.